Appointments

Yes, I'm getting an early Christmas gift this year: PORT REMOVAL! It's scheduled for Friday, Dec. 11, at B-J West, and will be oh-so-symbolic, a physical sign that, after some 15 months of testing, chemo and radiation, surgery, more chemo, more testing, this so-called "temporary setback" was just that: temporary. And now I can get on with my life, cancer-free once again. Please, somebody pinch me, 'cause I'm surely hoping I'm not dreaming ...

Just in case you're wondering what a "port" is, it's the little one-inch, triangular, plastic thing the doctors implanted, under the skin, on the right side of my chest way back in August 2008 that allowed them to take blood and give me chemotherapy many, many times without having to repeatedly use (and almost certainly mess up) the veins in my arms.

The port never bothered me, never hurt -- it's just "been there," ready to serve whenever the need arose. I would definitely recommend getting a port, if you ever have to go through chemo. (I love my port!)

I've got another appointment Dec. 30, two actually: with Dr. K and with a new doctor, a physical therapy doctor, Dr. P, who will take a look at my bum left leg and, hopefully, tell me what I can do to make it stronger. It still hurts, usually right after I've been sitting and stand up, but yesterday it felt pretty good so I walked about a mile, maybe a tad more, and I'd really like to continue the walking and work my way up to two or more miles. We'll see.

As for the neuropathy, the fingers are just slightly still numb, the toes more so, but I'm thinking both might be back to normal in a few months. Again, we'll see.

That's about it for now -- thanks for checking on me!

Until next time ...
P

Happy Thanksgiving

Dear God,

Thanks for everything you've brought us through in the past year -- from my cancer, to Hannah's brain tumor, to all the struggles in between. It's been truly miraculous, and now I really know nothing is beyond your ability.

Please help us to know what you want us to do in the "extra" years you have given us, and please give us the strength and willpower to do it.

Bless all those who have stood beside our family, helping us cope. And thank you for putting them in our lives.

Thanks, too, for connecting us with the right doctors, and for blessing them with the knowledge and skill to bring us back to good health.

We love you, Lord, and we'll be forever grateful for your mercy. Amen.

Now I'd like to share a prayer for anyone who is faced with a problem or struggle in the coming year. I'm not sure who wrote it, but I really like it:

The light of God surrounds me.
The love of God enfolds me.
The power of God protects me.
The presence of God watches over me.
Wherever I am, God is.
And all is well.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Until next time ...
P

To-do list

So, I've checked the "conquer cancer" box on my to-do list, but I still have a few things left to do:

• get my port removed. It's "out-patient" surgery, and I should be able to get it taken care of within a couple of weeks at Barnes Jewish West. Wow, even though it never really bothered me (I always forgot it was there until they had to access it in the chemo pod), it will be nice to have a normal chest again, one without that little triangular "bump."
• get my "bum" leg back to normal. For a couple of weeks now, my left leg (the one they took all the lymph nodes out of) has been sore and I've been limping a bit. It hurts on the inside of my thigh when I put pressure on that leg or raise it (going up steps is rather painful 'cause it involves both movements). I saw my radiation guy last Friday, who checked it over and even pulled up my CT and PET pictures on his computer, but he's not sure what caused it (I think it started after I worked out on a treadmill at work, so I'm thinking I pulled a muscle or something). Anyway, he's given me the name of a physical therapy doctor, so I plan to call her office tomorrow. It would be nice to know what I can do to get it back to normal, exercise-wise.

I'll be sure to update you on both of my "to-do" items when I know something.

Until next time ...

P

Thank you, God!

So, Dr. K's nurse just called and said that the PET scan I had yesterday is ALL CLEAR and I am, truly, sincerely, CANCER FREE!

Thank you God, thank you family, thank you friends! This is my "dream come true" ...

More later ...
P

Celebrations

Last Friday night I got together with four friends to celebrate my cancer-free state. Four of us had helped out with a Girl Scout troop for our daughters from first through sixth grade, so we "bonded" big time, all of us sharing all the typical GS activities, such as:

• making "swaps" and going to swap meets ...
• taking samples of pond water (and getting a little wet and muddy) ...
• making milk-jug skeletons for Halloween ...
• "camping out" at the St. Louis Zoo, a local gym, and GS camps ("Um, do you smell smoke?") ...
• holding baby-sitting nights with games and snacks ...
• selling cookies and collecting "April showers" donations ...
• soliciting "illegal" (according to stringent GS rules) donations for Mother Teresa's work in India (more than $400!) ...
• flying to Chicago for a fun-filled three-day weekend!

Six years of fun, fun, fun! So on Friday, we toasted my no-more-cancer report with champagne, relived the past, shared the latest news, and looked to the future (we may form a book club!), breaking up our little party at 2:30 in the morning!

Then, yesterday, my saintly sister and I went shopping with our mother, ending the day with wine and food at a local eatery, where we sat outside on the patio in 65-degree weather (in November!), just enjoying life. We even had dessert because, well, we were celebrating our good day!

And tonight I'm joining a couple of other long-time friends at yet another celebration, woo-hoo!

For my birthday earlier this month my saintly sister gave me a silver bracelet with the sentiment, "Each day is a gift from God." And it is! And we need to celebrate that a little bit every day by sharing precious moments with family and friends, maybe having that dessert!, doing something nice for someone else (or making them laugh), or heck, just smiling at the world!

Thanks for checking on me!

Until next time ...

P

Another scan

Darn! Just when I thought I was out of the woods, I find out I have to have another body scan. Dr. K, my newest doctor (the one who took the place of my primary surgeon), suggested the first time I saw him a month or so ago that he wanted a PET scan, in addition to a CT. So I thought both would be done at the same time. Problem is, nobody ever actually scheduled the PET, so all I got was the CT, which looked fine.

So, after I saw my oncologist, Dr. W-G, and heard that all was well, I asked her if I needed the PET. She didn't think so, but told me to call Dr. K to see if he still wanted it. So I called and talked to his assistant, who said she would "make sure he sees the CT" and let me know.

Well, a few days ago she called back and said that, yeah, he still wants it. Even though the CT looked good, the PET is better for the kind of cancer I had, she told me. The PET (Position Emission Tomography) looks at the body's functional processes, such as tumor metabolic activity -- something no other test does. For the test, I'll be injected with a radioactive sugar, FDG, which is taken up by cells that use sugar, such as cancer cells. So it will actually be a better way to determine if any cancer is still there.

The test is scheduled for 8 a.m. on Tuesday, Nov. 17, at Barnes-Jewish West, and should take about two hours.

Please pray that the PET also shows no cancer, and that I am truly "cancer-free."

Until next time ...
P

Simple pleasures

What a great birthday I had! Just knowing that the CT scan was clear -- no cancer -- was enough to make this birthday the best ever!

My sister (the nurse/maid/saint) took me out to my favorite Italian restaurant for lunch, accompanied by wine and dessert, of course. And I decided not to return to work, since it was a beautiful sunny day -- and my birthday, for Pete's sake!

My daughter, Hannah, suggested that we drive to Dylan's school (nearly two hours each way) so that he could join us for dinner, and, since it was such a nice day, her dad and I decided, yeah, we could do that. It was so nice to see Dylan again, and I think maybe he was glad to see us, too!

We had fun at dinner, and then headed to a nearby Wal-Mart to pick up a few things for Dyl, and that's when I saw the "claw" machine -- you know, those arcade games where you put in a quarter and try to pick up a toy with a "claw" that drops down and closes.

I'm a sucker for those things, so the kids and I had a ball playing with it -- and Dylan and I even "won" two little stuffed animals! (See photo at right.) We probably spent $4 total, but I swear, we had fun that was worth way more than that! You should have heard me whooping and hollering when I won a little stuffed dog! (Actually, maybe you did hear me, about 8:30 last night? I was pretty darn excited.) ... I'm convinced that being successful at the "claw" is one part skill and three parts luck!

So, yeah, it's the "simple pleasures" in life that make the best memories -- and get the most laughs! Maybe a good thing to remember in these tough economic times ...

Until next time ...
P

Basking in the glow

So, it's been three days since I found out that the CT scan was "all clear" and my cancer just might be gone forever. Three days of pure bliss. And I'm still basking in the glow ...

Things sure are different now. Before Thursday, whenever I thought about next year, a little voice would whisper, "Will I still be around next year?" Now I'm thinking, "Hell, yeah, next year will be my year!" My year of good health, my year of paying off medical bills, my year of making plans and getting things done.

2010 -- the year of Paula!

Re: my cancer treatment, I've still got a few things to take care of, though. Since my new doctor, Dr. K, had recommended that I get a PET scan in addition to the CT (my oncologist, Dr. W-G, isn't sure why he wants one), I called his office the other day and talked to his assistant about it. She said she would make sure he gets to see the CT and let me know if they still want to schedule a PET scan (which provides a different -- and better -- picture, as I understand it) and they'll let me know.

Also, I'm supposed to decide when I want to get my port removed (a Monday, Wednesday, or Friday of my choosing), so I've got to schedule that. (It's "out-patient" surgery.) I'll probably wait until I hear from Dr. K's office about the PET.

You know, last Thursday, when I found out I was cancer-free, I mentioned to someone at work that I don't think I can ever have a bad day again. Of course, life will present struggles and difficulties, as it always does, but, truly, after hearing that I've beat cancer, I feel like nothing can ever bring me down again. A true "silver lining."

Until next time ...
P